Over at Dear Author, there’s a big discussion going on about stuff happening at RT. Nah, I’m not going to go into it-that topic has been done, done and redone. I have nothing new to add to it and since I can’t offer some brilliant new solution to make all peoples everywhere happy, I’ll save my brilliance for more things. 😉 Like talking. I’m very good at that when I want to be.
But there were a few comments made along the lines that people wanted erotic romance to be embraced so they shouldn’t be surprised if tacky and tawdry make an appearance.
Pretty much, I disagree with that idea. Am I offended? Nah. These comments came from people who are entitled to their opinions just as we all are.
I don’t think I write porn-somebody else may, and that’s their opinion. At one time, did I care more if somebody assumed what I wrote was porn without bothering to read it? Yeah. Do I now? Not so much.
Here’s why.
It’s a matter of personal opinion. Personal taste. Personal likes and dislikes. I’ve read mainstream books with sex so pathetically gratuitous, I couldn’t believe it was considered romantic by anybody’s standards. On the flip side, I’ve read erotic romances so hauntingly beautiful, it’s a frickin’ shame more people don’t give the genre a fair try-because trust me, the books they are missing out? For a romance lover, they are books not to be missed.
People referred to making the ‘lines between erotic romance and romance’ more defined.
Me, I have to wonder if it’s possible to make a hard, clear, defined line. Because it breaks down to personal opinion.
Erotic romance is going to have more explicit, blunt language and the sex isn’t ‘hidden’ behind a closed door.
Romance may or may not have sex scenes that may or may not be hidden behind closed doors.
The kicker, though, each of them have a romantic relationship that is supposed to take front and center-that romance is supposed to be the driving force. Erotic romance and romance, the intimate scenes should advance the plot.
They shouldn’t just be there to titillate.
I imagine we’ve all read books where the sex is just thrown in, almost as filler or because it seemed the sex needed to happen by page XXX or there needed to be soooooo many sexual situations in a book with this particular word count.
The shocking, blunt language that bothers so many doesn’t bother others-some consider it too graphic, too crude-but words have as much or little power as a person lets them have.
An example, back in the 1700s (I think-not entirely sure of my period references) the word f*ck wasn’t really considered a vulgar word, just one used to describe two people having sex.
Although, since I can’t be easy, that yucky C word does bother me and it bothers me enough that if I see it, I may just stop reading the book. Hate that word.
Others, don’t care. Others that write or read erotic romance don’t care. Others that don’t write or read erotic romance probably don’t care.
It’s a ll a matter of taste. All opinion.
Trying to put a clear and focused definition on something that can very so widely from one person to another just isn’t going to work. There are some people who’d be absolutely shocked at the level of heat found in any given romance-those who’d prefer nothing more than a peck on the cheek. That being the case, would we then need another clear cut line…well other than the genre lines themselves, inspirational versus non-inspirational, etc.
Trying to take erotic romance out of the romance genre just isn’t going to happen. It came in riding on one huge wave. Maybe the wave has leveled out, maybe not, but one thing I think *is* certain is that erotic romance isn’t going to disappear. Like any trend, it will be on top for a while, then gradually level off. But disappear altogether? I don’t see it happening.
Vamps and Scamps 
Personally, I would hate if erotic romance was considered a separate entity as much as I hate the idea of equating romance and erotic romance with porn, and just as much as I hate the idea of anyone setting boundaries for what kind of loving relationship consenting adults of any stripe, sex, color, size, religion, or height can have.
That brings up the question of how the book sellers know where to shelve the books. Sometimes I’ll find an author in the romance section, sometimes in the erotic section, and even sometimes in the general fiction setting.
[…] uber thought-provoking post is over at V&S Posted on May 8, 2008 by shilohwalker Found […]
Interesting topic. I flirt with reading erotic romance. Not all of it is my cup of tea. But I never say never since I never thought I’d become a reader of paranormal and moving into the Urban Fantasy realm with no HEA at the end.
I do not think erotic romance is porn.. porn is porn. You are right … there is a reason for the sexual scenes in the story. It isn’t gratuitous.
Interesting post.
I agree with the notion that ER is NOT porn. But as you say, each person’s *comfort levels* will be different. And what I choose to read is indeed much different than what I would like to be subjected to in real life. ( with the possible exception of my own bedroom with my DH!)
For me, it’s kind-of like Steven King’s stuff. Oh, I love to read his books, but I CAN NOT watch the movies. I can turn down/adjust the *gore/creepy/scary* aspects in my mind while reading, but on the screen- not a chance! In a way it’s like that with ER. I can read it with no problems. But to see it “acted out” in front of me? In a crowd? In PUBLIC?
Nothankyouverymuch!
Oh, and the historian in me must back you on the F*ck reference. It was actually Queen Victoria that thought the word was “crass” and proclaimed it “evil/vile/derogatory”. Up until her reign, it was a perfectly acceptable term for teh sex.
Oh, and the historian in me must back you on the F*ck reference. It was actually Queen Victoria that thought the word was “crass” and proclaimed it “evil/vile/derogatory”. Up until her reign, it was a perfectly acceptable term for teh sex.
*G* See what happens when you research for writing a historical romance? 😉 I learned that while reading up on the Rev. War period for Hunter’s Mercy.
Shiloh: you may have listed them before, but for someone (not myself), who looks at erotic romance askance do you have a list of really super good favorites that you would recommend?
I have to agree with you on this. It is personal taste and personal opinion. I don’t think you write porn either. My definition of porn varies greatly from others’ definitions, so on this topic, I’ve kept my opinions to myself. 🙂